My Fashion Retail Battles

I want to tell you about a very stressful weekend that I went through. I'm not exactly sure why I want to share this, but I do. I apologize if it gets lengthy. You are under no obligation to read all of it. I just cannot skip over the details and make it short, because it's the details that are important.

I have recently registered with a recruitment agency that sends me offers for temporal part-time jobs in fashion retail. Usually it comes out of the blue and they are very short placements, just filling in where somebody is missing. Anyway, since I am embarking on an exciting trip and I need to earn money to pay back to my lovely family who have funded my travelling adventures, I decided to pluck up my courage and I replied to one of the offers. 

What followed was one of the hardest things I have ever done. And I shall tell you the story of how the little inexperienced me battled through a weekend in fashion retail, quietly repeating to myself: "London, I'm doing this for you." 

Side note: The brand that I worked for shall not be named. Firstly, I think I signed something about not spilling the secrets of the business etc., also I might be working for them again. So, let's just imagine a generic fashion store.

image sources here and here

DAY 1

Luckily, I grew out of ... not going to places that scare me. I tricked myself into not thinking about it too much, kept myself busy beforehand and then just went there. I was dragged somewhere deep inside the mall, where mere mortals are not allowed, then back into the store and I was told to pick up any items of clothing that may have fallen down to the floor. That was my job. For a couple of hours. Cruising the store and picking up clothes... As I found myself a little bored I tried to kill some time/show initiative and tried to straighten some shirts that were supposed to be folded in a pile. I was told that slow tidying was ineffective and that I should really focus just on picking up all that stuff from the ground and do it properly.

It's not like there were tons of it :/ *raises eyebrow* This resulted in me not daring to raise my eyes from the floor anymore. About halfway through my shift I was reassigned (How thrilling!) to tidy up the lingerie section. Yipee! There's nothing I love more than fiddling with bras for hours and hours. Actually to be honest, that was the one skill that I had learned that day: I can now properly hang a bra on that tiny little hanger. Very useful for life, isn't it?

At least there was good music. Don't know about you, I always enjoy the music they play in stores. Sometimes I have a little quiet sing along while I'm shopping, or dance a little when a particularly good song comes on... Well, since I had to spend hours in the store, and I was not at all a happy bunny, on the verge of losing my mind, the music literally saved my life. Thank God for music.

One of the songs that played was "Pompeii" by Bastille, a favourite of mine, that I really enjoy... On this day and this occasion however, it grew bitter. "How am I gonna be an optimist about this?" and "Does it feel like we've been here before..." gained a painful meaning, because I had been here before.  I have once worked in a fashion shop. Mind you, a teeny tiny one, with a very different attitude.... But I was there... 2 years ago. And here I am now... and career-wise, not much has changed. Once again, I am in a store, straightening hangers, picking up clothes from the floor, feeling like I'm burying all of my talents and skills.

I don't know why, but it is at times like these, that I feel a sudden surge of ambition to make something of my life. There is a fire inside me, a yearning to be creative and productive and make something important that would inspire people... I only wish those desires would take a slightly more specific shape, for I am afraid they are much too vague to be pursued. It felt like I was a wild animal and somebody put me in a cage and there was no way out. The only thing to do was bow your head and get used to being unhappy.

I realize I'm being slightly over dramatic. It was just a little temp job. But that's what it felt like. Of course, I was aware that a portion of my dismay was down to the initial shock, the simple fact that I haven't been working for a while and first days are first days. Especially in such a fast paced retail environment.

I fought hard not to show the tears in my eyes on the way home. I felt crushed and beaten. So miserable and angry that I was either going to have a crying meltdown or go on a killing spree. All of my body hurt. And I knew there was one more day of torture to survive.

DAY 2

I am proud of myself for not backing down. I was more nervous than the day before and I wished there'd been a way for me not to go there. But I was brave. I imagined king Henry V (as played by Hiddles) pep-talking me and I went in. A different store of the same brand. Different people. From the minute I walked in, it was different. I hadn't even taken off my jacket and already I was advised on how to treat customers (smile, say hello, be nice and polite). I was introduced at a staff meeting at the beginning of the shift and I had a girl assigned to me, who would explain and show me what to do. My duty for the day was taking care of the fitting rooms.

That included welcoming the customers, tidying all the leftover clothes and hangers from the cubicles and mainly sorting all the clothes they didn't want, which proved to be the hardest for me. There was a special system based on the specific collections and lines of clothing and... It was a lot to take in and remember. I was trying very hard not to make mistakes, but I realized after a while that I was too slow and I needed to pick up the tempo. Then I was made aware by my supervisor that I really did need to pick up the tempo. But I was just so frustrated, mainly by all the the things that didn't fit the system. Clothes without hangers. Shoes. General mess on the top of my counter which I did not know how to tidy and it was driving me mad... (Dear, oh dear, I am a Mr Monk.)

I ended up crying. Not my proudest hour, I tell you. My supervisor kindly gave me a little break to go compose myself. I then tried to explain to her, that she had done nothing wrong. It was just me learning to cope with a fast paced environment that I had never worked in before, and it was hard. That's all. It was difficult for me and it was my job to adapt and cope with it. And that included tears.

I went back and then there was a swirl of people - my "colleagues" - sorting out all the mess, taking the racks full of clothes, bringing me empty ones... One of the girls started talking to me, turned out she'd only been working there for 4 days. And then there was a guy who worked there and any time he passed through the changing rooms, fetching something, or whatever... He was so cheerful and supportive, dropping these little tidbits of encouragement :) I think these two were, besides me, the lowest in the food chain, if you know what I mean. The fact that they accepted me as a person, who is fighting and struggling, meant a lot to me. In the end, I almost felt like a part of the team.

And everything got better :) I got better at the sorting, I stopped worrying about every piece of clothing that I couldn't place, and most surprisingly, I enjoyed the contact with the customers. I found a strange kind of comfort in being able to be nice to somebody. I was glad and grateful that there were people I could say hello to, smile at them and thank them when they buried me in a pile of clothes they didn't want. And as far as I could tell, they appreciated it. So the pleasure was mutual.

Very surprising. I would never have thought that me, the queen of introversion, would find support and comfort in people. Total strangers, no less.

At the end of the day, all was good in my little fitting room kingdom. I even felt like I sort of knew what I was doing and I aced the customer assistance and all. I especially enjoyed the tourists coming in, 'cause then I could whip out some English and nothing makes me more smiley than that :) Overall the main difference, compared to the other store, was that I felt like a person. Whereas the day before, I was a machine. I was meant to be a machine that picks up things from the floor. And that offended me greatly and crushed my spirit. This day however, I was a human being. An emotional and nervous one, but human. And I know that I improved in what I was doing and that the rest of the team, or some of them at least, appreciated the job that I had done.

And I was all bright and smiley when I was leaving, I didn't mind about the rain and I went home singing.

The only thing that I deeply regret is that when my shift was over, I got my papers signed and they made me leave so quickly that I didn't even get a chance to say goodbye and thank you to my two supportive colleagues: the girl that, try as I may, I cannot remember the name of, and Rony. I know they're not reading this, but.. I honestly wish I could run into them and say thank you for being so kind to me. It saved me.

Lessons to be learned from all of this:

1. Be nice to people and appreciate that they are people. It will make you feel good and it will make them feel good.
2. I am brave and I can do things I've never done before. And the harder it is, the happier it makes you.

And that is the end of my fashion retail story. For now.